You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
