apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
