you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
