Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
