It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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