the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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