About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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