I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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