Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
