she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
