Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Randomize
