Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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