do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
