That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
We need to rekindle our bromance
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
