I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
