Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
