omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
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