I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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