hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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