Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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