Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure

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(248): Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure http://tfl.nu/x7gl

Replies (10) Good night (1661) Bad night (638)
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(212): View more from New York

Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...

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(212): Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward... http://tfl.nu/8dba

Replies (1) Good night (1660) Bad night (845)
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(317): View more from Indiana

and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.

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(317): and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka. http://tfl.nu/vpiu

Replies (10) Good night (4583) Bad night (577)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm

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(612): I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm http://tfl.nu/twuk

Replies (21) Good night (3578) Bad night (4385)
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(503): View more from Oregon

No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.

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(503): No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school. http://tfl.nu/ym74

Replies (7) Good night (7521) Bad night (807)
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(630): View more from Illinois

He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?

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(630): He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that? http://tfl.nu/r8k1

Replies (44) Good night (1201) Bad night (8789)
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(303): View more from Colorado

It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.

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(303): It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence. http://tfl.nu/6jog

Replies (22) Good night (8445) Bad night (1371)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself

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(678): I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself http://tfl.nu/rqfe

Replies (29) Good night (2120) Bad night (4282)
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(757): View more from Virginia

I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here

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(757): I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here http://tfl.nu/86vy

Replies (4) Good night (1874) Bad night (718)
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(208): View more from Idaho

Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.

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(208): Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon. http://tfl.nu/yvgl

Replies (6) Good night (1561) Bad night (574)
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(248): View more from Michigan

There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style

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(248): There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style http://tfl.nu/z785

Replies (5) Good night (1995) Bad night (569)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.

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(303): Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV. http://tfl.nu/f5v6

Replies (3) Good night (455) Bad night (1206)
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(802): View more from Vermont

Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!

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(802): Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy! http://tfl.nu/gv3p

Replies (10) Good night (1165) Bad night (384)
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(503): View more from Oregon

So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.

(503): View more from Oregon

He asked if he could come over tomorrow....

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(503): So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn. (503): He asked if he could come over tomorrow.... http://tfl.nu/yk5d

Replies (9) Good night (1587) Bad night (320)
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(347): View more from New York

Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.

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(347): Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm. http://tfl.nu/3ccq

Replies (0) Good night (498) Bad night (284)

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