NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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