He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
