last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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