Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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