I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
