do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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