question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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