i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
