i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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