I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
