I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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