make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
