i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Randomize
