This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
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I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
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My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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