Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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