Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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