Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize