u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
