I cockslap morals
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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