I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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