ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize