There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
