We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize