Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize