I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
