so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize