operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
send nudes
from the living room?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
