I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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