I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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